One morning when I was in year 6, I managed to get my hands on a beautiful white rose. After poking my nose in it to take in the scent, I immediately knew who I wanted to give it to. I guarded the precious rose all the way to school. The most important thing at that moment was to reach the target of my adoration before anyone else beat me to it. I wanted to show how much I admired her. Giving her a rose was symbolic of that.
The intended recipient was none other than my class teacher. I got to the class just before the first bell rang. As usual, rows of green-and-white uniformed children chattering and playing with the hinged lids on their wooden desks filled the muggy room with an oppressive roar. But as soon as our teacher walked in, the noise stopped as we unanimously stood up to greet her. When she had signalled for us to sit down, I ran to the front of the room to hand her the flower. She took it with a smile and clipped the flower in her hair immediately. I grinned with pride watching my rose sitting so gracefully in my teacher’s shiny black hair beautifully complementing her crisp green-and-white school uniform.
That behaviour is what I’ve now come to know as “sucking up.”
But I wasn’t alone in that. If you are a teacher in Burma, you will be surrounded by suck ups otherwise known as students. Burmese students routinely fuss over their teachers, giving them flowers and presents, carrying their bags and books for them, fetching them a glass of water etc. Teachers can easily ask their students to jump. And they will be falling over each other to ask “how high, Sayar?”
Despite the corrupt ineffective school system the military government made sure we got (or maybe because of that), education is seen as sacred by most Burmese. Teachers who deliver that education, known in Burmese as Sayar (or Sayar Ma for females), are put on a pedestal. Teachers automatically earn respect, obedience and adoration from their students. There is a blind optimism and trust that if you are a Sayar, you want your students to learn and do well in life.
The students will hang onto your every word. They will obediently listen to you if you scold them. They won’t backchat. They will give you presents. If you are a woman, they may even give you a flower to put in your hair. You will have hordes of students coming to pay you respect with presents every year around October which is a gift-giving season. While you sit on your chair, they will sit on the floor and pay you homage just because you’ve taught them something.
Anyone who brings them education, be it a teacher, private tutor, lecturer, is a “Sayar” or “Sayar Ma”. They are on the same respect level as parents and monks. And the older you are, the better. There is an assumption that if you are older, you have more experience and therefore, you’ll be better able to impart your wisdom to them. I’ve come to realize there is a flaw in that theory after coming across some people who get more foolish with age. But the Burmese are very good at gluing assumptions to their brain even in the face of overwhelming contrary evidence. So, if you are an old Sayar, you’ll get even more suck ups who will constantly tell you how handsome you are even if you have a hair style like Boris Johnson’s. They will tell you that you are the smartest teacher in the world even if all you did was show them a few funny cat videos on Youtube in the hope of learning English. If you are a female teacher, they will tell you how beautiful you are. They are saying these things to show their humility and respect for you as their Sayar.
It may sound very insincere. But that’s their way of showing you appreciation.
My adopted English dad was a teacher. He initially came to Burma intending to stay for just a couple of years doing his job. He ended up living there for 10 years because he was helplessly pulled by the suck-up-ness of the Burmese students. He had never been told so many times in his life that he was handsome, smart, clever, the best teacher ever etc. Well, who would be able to resist that? Then I came along and outcompeted all the other suck-ups and adopted him as my dad.
Fawning on teachers is ingrained in the Burmese culture. I was a master at that. To this day, from time to time, I find myself sucking up to tutors, bosses and anyone who is older and supposedly wiser. I keep having to pinch myself before someone whispers in my ear “nobody likes a suck-up”.